Sitting across from a laboring mama faced with an impending medical intervention that she wasn't planning on encountering, I saw her eyes begging me -- her doula -- to just TELL HER WHAT TO DO. I quickly apologized and reminded her that this is her birth. I can't tell you what to do. I can give you options, choices, alternatives, risks, and benefits. I can help you evaluate what is best for you. I can help you ask questions. But, I can not... I will not tell you what to do. So, I did what I always do and had the mom's partner ask the care providers to leave the room for a minute so they could have some time to think about things.
After the doctor left, I still did not tell them what to do. I told them the pros/cons of this intervention. I had them evaluate what their intuition was telling them about it. I helped them brainstorm questions to ask. That's what I do.
I'm not one of those warrior doulas. You know the doulas I'm talking about... The doulas who come storming in with their own agendas, thinking that every woman has to give birth the way that doula feels is "right".
But this is life. Every birth is different. As your doula, it's my promise to you that I will always help you to be armed with information and the tools to find your own voice.
<3 Your Knoxville and Chattanooga Doula,